back when i was in community college my teacher told us the story of a girl in his class who wanted to have sex with her boyfriend but they didnt have any lube so they used mayonnaise. fast forward a couple of days and she’s getting random orgasms during class and driving places so she goes to the doctor and they check her out and guess what they found
okay ill tell you it was maggots. maggots were in her vagina giving her orgasms.
even my nose runs more than i do
I’ve got 99 problems and 86 of them are completely made up scenarios in my head that I’m stressing about for absolutely no logical reason.
Noragami + Quotes
For the series finale of Supernatural, i want there to be a huge flood or something, and Sam feels something wash up against his bare feet, and there it is.
Sam’s lost shoe has returned to him.
the last part of his sole.
This is beautiful.
do me for the vine
the last one hahahahaha
did you know that scientists did a recent study showing that if you take a blue whale a lay it out onto a basketball court, the game is immediately cancelled
assassination: a nation that is sassy
the worst thing about speaking two languages is trying to use an expression from one language that fits perfectly into your conversation but the other person won’t get it
can you imagine if tumblr just decided to shut down and you see all these confused teenagers coming out of their house squinting at the sun
when ur walking around with just one shoe